Feel like life isn’t fair? Try focusing on this
I have been feeling pretty selfish lately.
With every vaccination administered and restriction lifted, society inches closer to the type of normalcy we have not seen in over a year.
And to be honest, I am not too thrilled about it.
Why would I be even the slightest bit bummed that things may soon begin to normalize? That life could resume outside of the extensive governmental restrictions?
Because I have no idea when my own confinement will end.
“Misery loves company” may be an overused cliché, but it is far from an embellishment. When life is most difficult, knowing we are not alone has the potential to provide a jolt of encouragement…even if it is at the expense of those involved.
Even though the last year has not been much different for me than the past few years, it was still refreshing to have everyone else in the same boat with me for awhile: stuck at home, unable to participate in most activities.
As government officials gradually begin to pull back lockdowns, mask mandates, and travel restrictions, I find myself wondering, Already? How did that go so fast?
Then I realize we have been living in this restricted world for over a year.
Do I want family and friends to be miserable? Absolutely not. I want people to be able to get back to work. To attend events. To be together in groups.
I just want to be able to participate, too.
As humans, we tend to believe that fairness is not only expected but required. Should we expect God to dole out perfectly balanced blessings and opportunities, while carefully minimizing and evenly spreading out hardship?
Why the emphasis on a perfectly even playing field?
Our tendency to become consumed with comparing our situations to what others are experiencing is nothing new. After Jesus rose from the dead, he informed a few of his closest followers some of what they could expect in the future.
Peter, in particular, was singled out by Jesus and was informed about the type of horrific death that awaited him as a martyr. Wanting to ensure this was not solely his cross to bear (pun intended), Peter points to his fellow disciple, saying, “What about him?”
Jesus’s words are telling: “What is it you? You must follow me.”
My job isn’t to look over my shoulder at what others are getting to experience. My job is to do the best I can with what is in front of me.
No matter the circumstances.
What is interesting is that when we get so fixated on wanting to ensure we are not suffering worse than others, it becomes easy to lose sight of just how fortunate we are.
I may not yet be able to assimilate back into society as easily as I would like, but I get to spend time with Stephanie and enjoy her amazing cooking every night.
I may not be able to go for a jog to escape being stuck inside, but I am more healthy, alert, and clearheaded than I have been in years.
I may not have a physical office or coworkers that I’m eager to get back to, but I have still been able to find meaningful work from home in recently publishing my book and now moving forward with getting licensed as an investment advisor.
There is still much to be grateful for.
I’m glad the world is starting to open back up and I look forward to the day where I can rejoin society.
Until then, however, I need to trust where God has me in the journey.
No matter what.
—Looking for an engaging summer read? Download the first chapter of my book, One Step Closer, for free here.
Hi Ryan – Thank you for sharing your heart with us. You are a true inspiration! I am currently going through some things in my life where I have a tendency to look back over my shoulder at what was instead of looking ahead at what is to come. You are so right when you say there is so much to be grateful for! Thank you for you words of wisdom. God is using you in a might way!
Blessings- Teresa
Thanks for sharing Teresa. Plenty to be thankful for indeed
What a great post! It is a simple principle to focus on our own race and let others find their own way with God’s help but for some reason we find ourselves in a default position in competition with others. I love the fact that God takes time and has the inclination to focus on each one of His children in their individual journeys with unique purposes for every pilgrim even though He is not restricted by time and space. What an incredibly boring world it would be if we all were on the same track with the same goals and the same results.
Thank you for the reminder articulated in such a cool way and the wisdom packed away which you so elegantly shared with your readers.
Appreciate the feedback Mary. Definitely glad the world isn’t that boring!
Ryan, we encourage you as you continue to achieve goals for yourself. It is wonderful that Stephanie is a superb cook. So is your cousin Catherine. Personal: A few years ago we were gathering at your parents’ house. I was meeting Catherine and Mark there. As I parked, I said, “We both got here at the same time.” The young woman in front of me responded,”Hi,I am Stephanie, Ryan’s girlfriend.” From a distance I had thought she was my own daughter Catherine! I pretended nothing happened. No sense in emphasizing my mistake.
You are ridiculously wise…. i wish i could articulate my thoughts 1/2 as well as you
So timely. I my am still struggling to adjust expectations of what my body “should” be able to do, nine years on…
Lindsay, how great if they worked how they “should” ! Thankfully, one day soon they will…
God’s timing is perfect and you allowed God to use you for this perfect time. Like others have stated, this article lines up with what I needed to hear. Life can really hand us some depression, struggles or down right ugly trials. Your encouragemet and challenge was well received. More prayer, more Bible, more of God and less of me.
Thanks brother!
Gary, glad to hear this resonated. Thanks for your feedback!
Love this post man! Julia and I miss hanging out with you and Stephanie. Can’t wait to get back and eat some skyline with you two!
Ryan, I finished reading your book lately, and was quite taken with how you worked through so much and found your way closer to Jesus. I, like you, have found out how spiritual warfare works. Someone has said it’s not about your past, it’s about Satan being frightened of who you will become. God is doing a great, great work in you. Thank you for your preservence. Yours and Stephanie’s too.